The World

Some people need a purpose in life and I am probably one of those people. This month, I’ve taken time to reevaluate my values (hehe) and make sure I’m living authentically. What’s interesting is that I’ve found a conundrum thinking about what’s important to me and what I want to be important to me. For example, I want all my relationships to be important to me (so I value connection), but I also spend a lot of my time alone and enjoy it and have difficulty finding motivation to be more proactive and developing relationships and scheduling hangouts (if no one invites me somewhere, I figure a free weekend as a blessing).

I think my purpose in life is to save the world. A tall order, I know. I find that I feel out of whack if I’m not actively pursuing and behaving in such a way to benefit the collective planet. It’s Idealist Me showing his ultimate desire. He’s balanced with Rationalist Me who wants to just live a simple life. They’re not mutually exclusive, but there can be juxtapositions.

I was having difficulty reconciling what’s deemed important, so I created a list (consistency, son), which could be called a manifesto of sorts, in which I detail how I want to and how I can live my life. I plan to continually edit it through my lifetime in order to really hone in on what makes me me and put words to my life philosophies.

Last month has mostly been lowkey and if I’m being extra honest, I’ve been struggling with routine and finding motivation to do what I need to do. Talk about Avoidance April, amirite?

Signal Boost

Avengers: Endgame. The satisfying wrap-up to a decade-long adventure. I’m so happy with what they did and I’m so happy to have experienced this Universe. So well done. I have little words and I am still processing. Many tears, many chills.

Brene Brown: The Call to Courage. A Netflix original talk (?!) about a doctor’s studies with vulnerability, courage, shame. Deeply moving with anecdotes, charismatic, and surprisingly hilarious like a stand-up. Reminded me of Minhaj’s Homecoming King, inspirational and aspirational. I didn’t know what to expect, but I do love my TED Talks, so I hope this becomes normal. File it under B for becoming better beings (I’ve binged all of Rod Serling’s The Twilight Zone).

Captain Marvel. An MCU movie that brings us 90s goodness. I loved the references and the old school tone, I loved that it wasn’t trying to hard, but I also understand how monumentally important this movie is for society (because I’m not an asshole). Yet another great addition to the Universe. Teared up at times. Chills when the suit and the powers came out. Not enough Lee Pace, not enough Gemma Chan.

Glass. The last movie a Shyamalan trilogy about superheroes or something like that. Split surprised me and I really enjoyed it, but then it just fizzled out and this was a weird movie. Finally getting into 2019 films (finished everything in 2018 finally) and this is what I start with? Definitely not enough James McAvoy personalities and a whole slew of characters I don’t care about.

Guava Island. A short semi-musical semi-thriller film on Amazon Prime Video. Of course, with Donald Glover and Rihanna as leads, it would be charismatic. It’s a beautiful story and art piece, but I wish there were original songs. Nice insight into the mind of Glover and his latest releases.

Juanita. A Netflix original movie about a woman who needs to get out of her regular routine in order to feel alive again. Well, if that doesn’t hit the nail on the head. Alfre Woodard is great in every role, and this one is no different. A cute film with indie vibes.

Someone Great. A Netflix original movie about a woman going through a breakup and needs the help of her friends. Generic and not all that substantial, but I clicked fast because of Gina Rodriguez and Lakeith Stanfield. Completely charming and good millennial fodder when you’re in the mood.

Triple Frontier. A Netflix original movie about a heist of a South American crime lord by a team of former Special Ops. Interesting concept, well acted, overall forgettable.

Unicorn Store. A Netflix original movie about a woman who can’t grow up and then goes shopping for a pet unicorn. Cute, whimsical, random, and a reminder to hold onto one’s child-like imagination and sense of wonder. Brie Larson is great.

I Think You Should Leave with Tim Robinson (season 1). A Netflix original sketch show that’s super random and hilarious and awkward and hyperbolic and relatable.

Kim’s Convenience (season 3). A show about a cute little Korean Canadian family and their everyday lives. All seasons are on Netflix and you should definitely watch even if you feel like you can’t relate because it is just so precious and funny. I love all the actors, they are so endearing. I think what’s powerful is that we are laughing with them and we can relate to their struggles- it’s not exclusively Korean or Asian, but just a family- with immigrant flavor.

Our Planet. A Netflix documentary series, narrated by David Attenborough, about conservation issues that our planet deals with and how the animals must deal with a changing world because of humans. Beautifully shot and narrated, but of course, it made me really depressed. I wouldn’t say it’s groundbreaking; it’s a familiar and constant reminder that we share this planet and we should take care of her. Spoilers: the walrus scene killed me.

Rilakkuma and Kaoru (season 1). A Netflix stop-motion show about a young woman’s life struggles and her adventures with her pets, two bears and a bird. So incredibly cute and surprisingly deep (I relate to Kaoru, okay gosh). The main creepy thing is that Rilakkuma is wearing a suit and that freaks me out.

Special (season 1). A Netflix original series about a gay disabled millenial. A short watch and I am always keen to learn about different lifestyles. It’s endearing and sweet, though, again, very short so development wasn’t too great.

Tuca & Bertie (season 1). A Netflix original show about two bird friends and that’s all you need to know. Bojack Horseman + Ali Wong + Tiffany Haddish = brilliance. The animation is fun and quick and the characters are endearing and relatable. Hilarious, irreverent, very adult.

Lips on Lips by Tiffany Young. A debut English solo EP from my favorite ex/current SNSD member. Born Again is probably my favorite (it hit me the most), but all of the songs gave off nostalgic 90s R&B vibes and also gave us a personal look into her life more that bubblegum K-Pop. So happy for her, so proud of her.

Free Spirit by Khalid. An aptly named sophomore album that hits me right in the feels. Songs good for a weekend in to heal the soul.

Paradise Lost by John Milton. An epic poem about man’s fall from paradise and how Satan is evil, yada yada. But, as Philip Pullman said in his annotation, we start to feel for Satan as a character, more than we do God. He’s much more exciting and endearing. I can’t believe I got through my first ancient poem by myself! It wasn’t horrible, but if I take it as a piece of fiction and not some Bible truth, it becomes enjoyable.

Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari. A book about human history and how we’ve fucked up the world. Thanks Hanna for the rec (and letting me borrow!). Really insightful and intriguing points brought up; I found myself getting upset thinking about it. Some of it I knew, but there’s interesting perspective here. Well written, easy to understand, interesting.

~ by Btab on 3 May 2019.

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