The Log #16

The following is the final entry in my logs of my time away from life. This is Day 16.

Monday 11/30/15

Long work day. A lot of stuff to do. A lot on my mind. But it’s nice to work more. I’m always appreciative of the work I get to do.

I remember that no one has it all together. And even though I have problems, I can roll through the punches, because somehow, I’ll make it out okay. I’m trying not to feel disappointment in myself by getting rid of these expectations I place on myself. And of course, I can’t be happy all the time. And really, none of it matters in the grand scheme of the universe. So we should do our best in the time we have.

You know, sometimes I worry that I’m perfectly content, even prefer, being alone and single. I have no one to please but myself. And these past few weeks have been so beneficial to me. I was content to be the way I was. No FOMO. Solitude is something I love. I mean, I knew it wouldn’t be forever, and I was exhausted and in pain, but at the same time…it was freeing. It’s definitely the introvert in me needing to recharge, only this time, on a much larger scale.

Yet, as with all things, the cycle continues…

An optimistic end to my logs, right in time. Today is the last day of #yearof23, a rollercoaster of a year for sure. There’s a lot to think about in my life right now, though I’m trying to be more present. The past is the past, and this year I’ve learned a lot about myself. The future is the future, and while it’s a little hazy, I want to spend the rest of 23 and the rest of the year living more in the now.

There are, after all, a lot of festivities coming up and I don’t want to bog myself down with what’s next. I’m going to enjoy myself because I deserve it. I’m not sure if I want to do “year in review” post, nor am I sure I want to do a “year of 24” post just yet. So we will see.

Thanks for reading!

~ by Btab on 16 December 2015.

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